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Nightly Check-In - Extra Chit Chat

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table of contents


If your emotional bank account is high with each other you can also use Write & Share and Face to Face questions for Nightly Check In

Question Challenge
instead of any of these questions below, you can have a lot of fun just coming up with your own questions, on the spot!  But if you need some standards, consider some of these:  

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personal trivia

  1. Do you like your own handwriting?  Why?

  2. What is your favorite lunch meat?

  3. What's going right with our country? (or wrong)

  4. What are a few things you really like about yourself?

  5. From 1 to 10 how sarcastic are you and when do you you find yourself being sarcastic?

  6. Would you Bungee jump?  Why, or why not?

  7. What’s your favorite cereal?

  8. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off or when you put them on?

  9. Favorite ice cream

  10. Favorite smells.

  11. What did you talk about Favorite sport to watch.

  12. Favorite sport to play.

  13. Favorite sport to play with me.

  14. Favorite sounds (Top 1 to 5)

  15. Who was your favorite celebrity as a child.In what ways did you obsess over this person if you did?

  16. A favorite childhood memory: Favorite memories of your last school, or grade.

Recent news

  1. What has been the best event of the past 2 weeks.

  2. What’s the thing your most proud of right now? What’s the biggest news at work lately?

Current Personal World

These are some phrases you can use when your spouse (or child) is struggling with something.

  1. What (or "how") does it make you feel when you think about _______ (i.e. your upcoming finals, or your Mom’s visit next month etc.)

  2. What would make this better for you?

  3. Tell me more about _________

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  1. What are you you putting most of your energy into recently?

  2. Who would you confide in if you had a deeper personal problem?

  3. When was the last time you cried?

  4. What personal issues are you currently trying to resolve?

  5. Who or what do you miss the most, lately? Generally?

  6. What are your greatest strengths?

  7. What are some areas in your life that deserve some work?

  8. What drives you every day?

  9. What are you putting off?

  10. What are some things that are bugging you lately?

  11. What or who has the most consistent daily influence on you?

  12. What’s one of the most strangest and/or most frustrating things about this life?

  13. When you think about your relationship with your Heavenly Father, what kinds of thoughts and feelings come to you most of the time?

  14. What do you tend to worry about? (if you’re asked this question, do your very best not to implicate your partner for anything in your answer. Make it about YOU and what is sometimes happening in you.)

  15. How would you describe your attitude about your place in this world?

  16. How would you describe your attitude about your place in your family?

  17. What significant dreams have you experienced recently and what do you think they might represent?

  18. If you had to describe yourself in five words, what would they be?

  19. What accomplishment are you most proud of and why?

  20. If you weren’t working in the job you have now, what would you do?

  21. What’s on your bucket list?

  22. What is one of your best memories from childhood?

  23. If you could change something in the world, what would it be?

  24. What makes you happy?

  25. What makes you wildly happy?

  26. What would you most like to learn and why?

  27. What are your top fears?

  28. Which of your parents are you most like and why?

  29. How would you describe unconditional love?  

  30. What are your top five personal values?

  31. What goals do you have for the next five years?

  32. When do you feel the most confident and why?

  33. What big life changes have you recently experienced?  How did those changes impact you?

  34. What do you feel passionate about?  

  35. What really gets under your skin and makes you mad, at work, or about yourself, or anything other than me?

  36. What are some of your limiting beliefs?

  37. What is one of your most memorable dreams?

  38. If you could travel back in time, what time frame would you visit and why?

  39. What is the most valuable life lesson you’ve ever learned?

  40. What makes you sorry?

  41. What will be your legacy? If you could go back in time and fix any mistake you’ve made what would you fix?

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  1. If you had to give every human being one quality, what would it be and why?

  2. Do you have any recurring dreams? Describe them?

  3. What is the meanest thing someone could say to you?

  4. If you could be a famous athlete, actor, writer or musician which would you choose and why?

  5. If you had to marry someone, right now, who would it be and why?

  6. If you were the president of the united states what would be the first law you would push for and why?

  7. If you had to decide who would be the first kid on the moon, who would you give this privilege to and why?

  8. Who was the first boy/girl who thought YOU were cute and how did this make you feel?

  9. If you could fly, would you tell anyone?  Who.  Would you tell everyone?  Why?

  10. If you were invisible where would you go and what would you do?

  11. If your life was made into a movie, who would play you?  Why?

  12. If you could invent one thing what would it be?

  13. What is the greatest song ever written?  What does it mean to you personally?

  14. What is the most important quality for a boss to have?

  15. If you could know one thing about the future, what would it be?

  16. How much would I have to pay you to eat your favorite food, before you swallow spit it out and re-eat it?   

  17. How do you choose your friends?

  18. What is the first thing you notice about a person?

  19. Describe one of the most beautiful things you have ever seen.

  20. What would the cover of your autobiography look like if it could not be a picture of you or your family?

  21. If you could trade places with anyone in the world who would it be and why?

  22. What is most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to you?

  23. What is a time you lied to save someone's feelings?  

  24. What is the meanest thing you’ve done?

  25. Have you ever pooped yourself? Where, When and Why?

  26. What teacher have you hated the most? Why?

  27. What is the worst present you have ever received?  Did you pretend to like it?

  28. What was the most shocking thing that has ever happened to you?

  29. Which person has changed the most as far as your impression? How? 10. If you had 2 hours to live what would you do? You can’t do anything spiritual.

  30. What word describes you best?

  31. What is your greatest accomplishment?

  32. Where do you like to vacation, what do you like to do and why?

  33. Who do you admire?  Why?

  34. If you were invisible, what are some places you would you go and why?

  35. Something really kind  that someone has done for you. What effect that it have on you?

  36. What would you do with a million dollars if you couldn’t give it to poor people, or family-- and if the highest ticket item was $100,000 and if you had to spend it in 48 hours?

  37. If you were on an island, who would you want to be with? (of the same sex) Why?

  38. If you could own a non-traditional pet which would it be and why?

  39. Favorite show as a child and/or any good memories surrounding this show?

  40. Who was the last person you spoke to that you didn’t want to talk to and why?

  41. What was your favorite toy as a child?

  42. When was the last time you cried laughing and why?

  43. What music has most influenced you?

  44. If you were an animal, what would you be and why- what would you do your first day as this animal?

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“Particulars” is a fun way to increase your awareness of your spouse’s world, life, values, preferences and existence.

Particulars - Added value!  i.e. "How do you feel when _____________?"  or "Tell me more about how this, or how this feels when _________" etc.   You can add this question to any response on any of these questions. 

  • Favorite love language (including examples and perhaps how you feel when _______)

  • 2nd Favorite love language (including examples)

  • Favorite Holidays, in order and explanations (why? and/or how your spouse feels when the kind of holiday he or she has described unfolds)

  • Favorite traditions (part of holidays or not):

  • Favorite kinds of gifts (things you like me to buy you):

  • Favorite dates (things like you like to do on our date nights, including inexpensive to expensive):

  • Behaviors (my behaviors) that create positive energy and/or attraction toward me (i.e. when I play with the kids etc.)

  • Favorite romance activities (what warms your spouse’s heart, romantically?):

  • What you like me to do when you’re upset or working through something:

  • Top five favorite books of all time:

  • Top 5 favorite movies of all time:

  • Favorite foods:

  • Favorite Desserts:

  • Favorite restaurants:

  • 3 Closest Friends:

  • Favorite relatives.

  • Favorite childhood memories.

  • What do you like to do when you come home?

  • What do you like me to do when you come home?

  • What you like me to do or say when you are grieving

  • What you like me to do for you when you’re sick.

  • Favorite 2 to 3 colors.

  • Favorite massage i.e. foot, back, neck, head?

  • Favorite time to eat breakfast, lunch and dinner.

  • Favorite chore you do for me.

  • Clothing measurements

  • Shoe size.

  • Ring size.

  • Favorite nightly and/or self care.

Add some of your own!

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